20 Huddy Fics
by travln1
Summary: 20 ficlets and/or drabbles based on a prompt table. Huddy then & now. AU. Will be dark in places, light in others. Not a sunshine and rainbows, everyone lives happily ever after kind of fic. You have been warned. Thanks, as ever, to my beta: Wrytingtyme.
1. One

This is definitely AU. Huddy. Will be moody at parts, confusing at others, will be a little dark in parts. A set of 20 ficlets; maybe a drabble or two for the 20_fics prompt table I claimed at lj. All prompts in the table will be related and should be read in order (I re-organized the prompt table, which can be found at my lj...same username), and though this first one isn't Huddy yet...it leads up to it (and by the last fic, this first chapter will make sense...I don't want to give it away). As always, thanks to my lightening fast and brilliant betas: Chippers87 & Wrytingtyme.

One 

"_One, two, three, good job Lisa, come on just a little longer...nine, ten. It's almost over; count with me again. One-" _

"But Mommy, it hurts." Five year old Lisa tried not to look at the second large needle that was on the verge of piercing her skin. Glaring at the brutal beast who was assigned the job of routine vaccinations, Cuddy stuck her tongue out at him and looked at her mom, hoping the fake tears she managed to summon would do the trick.

"I know sweetie, just count with me one more time and it'll be all over, okay?"

Lisa hated the number one. One was always followed by two and then by three. Counting meant two things: she was in trouble and her father would give her until the count of three to obey his every word, or the number one meant her mother was trying to get her to calm down. Knowing the tears weren't working, Lisa began counting while trying not to look at that rather fascinating needle. "One, two, three…."

_______

"Okay, one more time, now. That's it. One, two, three, four, five, six…."

Cuddy gasped; she had always hated the number one.


	2. Cry

_Cuddy could count on one hand the number of times she'd cried in her twenty-two years of life. She simply wasn't a crier; perhaps she cried as an infant, she couldn't be sure, but as far as she could remember, crying was just something she didn't do._

__

She cried when she broke her arm in the fourth grade, though it was only for effect. She thought she was supposed to cry; sure it hurt, but not to the extent that she'd seen on television, where they made a broken arm out to be the most painful experience on earth.

She cried when Mike Brewer broke her heart in high school. She thought for certain he'd be the one she would marry.

She cried her first night on campus, alone in her dorm room; they were tears of happiness however, not of loneliness. Cuddy was overwhelmed with the excitement of new books, notebooks, pens and the endless possibilities that lie ahead.

She cried with her first and only "C" on an anatomy quiz.

But it was the fifth time she cried that she was certain she'd remember most. It was shortly after Thanksgiving break and she'd just received a message that her favorite grandfather, Nathaniel, had passed away. Not quite sure what to do with her unshed tears, she busied herself in the school library, trying to convince herself that she was fine. It didn't work.

After an hour of trying to keep the tears at bay and failing miserably, she suddenly found a hand thrust in her face; the hand came both with a tissue and an annoyed voice.

"I can't concentrate over your snivelling," he said.

Cuddy took the tissue from him without looking at him. "So sorry to bother you."

"You'd think someone died or something," House said.

"Yeah," she said tartly, "you'd think."

_He raised an eyebrow, turned on his heel and disappeared from her sight. Cuddy couldn't deny the small thrill she felt at her secret crush having bestowed up her the simple gift of a tissue, albeit with attitude._

_______

She'd lost count how many times she'd cried over the years. Tears were infrequent and usually spilled for someone else, including House. Most often House, actually. And now she sat alone in an exam room, with her hand covering her mouth, tears flowing freely in disbelief. It was far too soon.

House hid behind a post, gazing in through the glass, aware that tears of his own would spill, should he allow it. He remained dry eyed.


	3. Mystery

As always, thanks to my lightening fast and brilliant beta, Wrytingtyme.

Mystery

_He was captivated by her tight little body and the trademark heels she always wore. He wondered just how short she actually was without the illusion the heels provided. He knew she'd been watching him. House had managed to avoid her eyes, hoping each time that she hadn't seen him watching her, too. She was on the quiet side, but there was something about her that caused his roving eye to find her wherever she was on campus._

She was geeky, in a sexy sort of way; definitely a brain. Brains could maintain a conversation and he had no doubt that she could; he'd heard her several times in preceding weeks, uttering witty retorts and holding her own in the face of boys who thought they were more clever than reality proved them to be. She would likely hold up far longer than any of past girlfriends, based on wit alone. That body was nothing to laugh at, either.

Brains typically got his own brand of humor and they were good, in oh so many ways; sweet and innocent at first appearance, devilsh little creatures behind closed doors at second glance. House was more than intrigued and he knew she was one such brain. Her name was a mystery, but not for long; he was determined to find out more about her and he always_ got his way._

_______

House sat at her desk with a scowl on his face, unable to look at her, though he did admire her ass as she paced near the windows. _Oh that ass_, he thought. That sway had certainly caused him a considerable amount of trouble over the past twenty years.

"Don't you want to know?" she asked.

"Should I?"

"You don't want an answer to this mystery? This, this...puzzle?"

He shrugged. "Don't care."

She stopped pacing to face him, frustrated at his feigned disinterest. He wanted to know just as much as she did, though he'd never admit it. His wall was once again firmly positioned between them, her heels ill equipped for scaling it.

"Get out," she hissed.


	4. Sweat

As always, thanks to my amazing beta, wrytingtyme.

Sweat

_Cuddy hated to sweat; she hated the way it would trickle down into her eyes, stinging with salt. Though she found it didn't bother her one bit when it was a certain Greg House who was doing the sweating, not in the least; in fact, she rather enjoyed it._

She watched the sweat glisten on his biceps from afar. Cuddy always maintained her distance, just far enough away to be out of his sight should he turn around, but not far enough away to lose sight of him. She knew he went running every morning before his first class; she too ran every morning, though only since she'd first spotted him crossing campus on her way to an early morning group study session. He ran in a sleeveless t-shirt, sneakers and running shorts and she enjoyed watching every minute of his run.

By the fourth week, she was certain he knew she was watching him and she was almost sure that he was enjoying his view just as much as she was enjoying hers, as their paths criss-crossed on campus. Still hating the sweat that dripped into her face, she had to admit that her legs never looked sexier and her love of running was born.

_______

_Dammit_, Cuddy thought. She cursed silently as the sweat trickled down her forehead, a drop searing the corner of her eye. She hadn't anticipated the sweat; it left her sticky and wet, and even more miserable than before, if that was even remotely possible. This sweat certainly wasn't nearly as much fun working up as it had been before.


	5. Chase

As always, thanks to my amazing beta, wrytingtyme.

Chase

_House knew her name. Cuddy. Well, __Lisa_ Cuddy, but as with his own classmates, she too was known by her surname. And he knew that she'd asked around about him. The chase was on.

In the weeks following the crying in the library incident, she shot him a half smile whenever she passed him on campus; he'd give the slightest hint of a nod. And so it went. They didn't flirt in the traditional way. She didn't bat her eyelashes or flip her hair; he didn't act nervous, ask her on a date or offer to carry her book bag. Instead, they shot mild insults and furtive glances at one another. He appreciated her non-ditziness, unlike so many of the girls on campus who were all hair and no brain. And she was attracted to his ostentatious reputation; he was somewhat reckless, opinionated, stubborn and dammit all if he wasn't right in nearly every instance.

Cuddy knew that he spelled trouble, she knew a relationship with him would be wrong in every way, but he challenged her at every turn, often leaving her befuddled as to his intentions. She couldn't be sure if he was disinterested, or head over heels infatuated but one thing was certain: the chase would be fun.

He was infatuated.

"I hear you won the dean's 'Most Prestigious' award," he said one afternoon as the pair sat next to each other in the library. He'd joined Cuddy at her table weeks earlier, not saying a word as he sat across from her that day and she didn't acknowledge his presence. They'd sat together ever since, and conversation had slowly morphed from head nods and half smiles to insults, retorts and intelligent banter.

"You heard or did you specifically go check the board to find out if I'd won?"

House shrugged.

"I'm the first woman to ever win."

"I'm the only one who's won it twice."

"And little ol' me, a lowly undergrad, beat you, Mr. Hotshot med student, which makes my win this year twice as sweet."

"Who says I entered?"

"The second place announcement," she said with a wide grin.

There was something about her that he couldn't quite put his finger on; maybe it was her chest, possibly her ass or maybe it was the way she always seemed to wind up at the top of her game. Maybe it was her brilliance, and not just her academic brilliance, but the spark he felt whenever he saw her. She both annoyed the hell out of him and thrilled him simultaneously.

Admiring her pluck while at the same time frustrated at having lost his two time title, to a girl no less, House inhaled sharply before he possessively went in for a kiss. A kiss, right there in the library, for all to see.

_______

Wilson was out of breath and livid; he didn't have time to chase after his misanthropic friend. He was beyond angry with House and his childish ways; House should have answered his phone, six phone calls over the course of an hour should have told House that he was calling for more than just a friendly chat.

Why a cripple would want to climb to the rooftop was beyond him, but that's where Wilson found him. That's where he always found him.

"You could have answered your phone."

"Obviously I'm busy."

"It's Cuddy...."


	6. Forgotten

As always, thanks to my incredible beta, wrytingtyme, who really goes above and beyond!

Forgotten

_Cuddy waited for him early one morning, on the green in front of the school library. They had an unspoken agreement to meet, just after dawn, for a not so lazy jog around campus. They regularly spurred one another on, pushing to run just a bit further, though they both knew he could out run her in both speed and distance, though he never did. It had become an unspoken routine of pushing, challenging, running._

__

And yet, there she was that morning. Alone. Forgotten.

While she knew they didn't have a verbal agreement to meet, and that they were by no means an item, she had hoped he too felt the attraction. There was that one rogue kiss in the library; it had left her feeling somewhat confused, as if it was a kiss stolen just to see if he could steal it. They hadn't kissed again since, but they weren't awkward about it, nor did they discontinue their casual library get togethers.

_She waited until twenty minutes after the usual start time before she turned towards her dorm, no longer interested in running that day._

* * *

He said he'd meet her. House promised. _Right, House promised; which meant he'd forgotten_, Cuddy thought as she waited in the lobby.

He'd made it very clear in the preceding days that he was not interested; that this was a task he had no desire to participate in.

Cuddy glanced at the clock for the umpteenth time before deciding he wouldn't show. She picked up the small redwood box and headed for the parking lot.


	7. Promise

As always, thanks to my incredible beta, wrytingtyme, who really goes above and beyond! And thanks for the kind reviews :) The second part should not be in italics, but is giving me hassles this morning.

Promise

___Cuddy sat with her hand in his. He was stretched out on the hospital bed in the nursing home, a nasal cannula affixed with oxygen constantly flowing. His skin was almost translucent, well past the pallid complexion the cancer caused only weeks earlier._

____

Her grandfather cracked one eye open and gave Cuddy the most genuine smile he could muster. "Promise me something."

"Anything, Grandpa."

"Only you know where to go. I've never shown anyone else that place, not even your grandmother, God rest her soul."

Tears formed in her eyes as she shook her head. "No, it's too soon."

Nathaniel gripped her hand tightly. "I'm counting on you, Lise." He motioned for Lisa's mother to pass her the small redwood box on the night stand. "Have them put my ashes in here, with my Bessie and hike up the hill to our spot and spread my ashes there."

"Dad," Cuddy's mom interrupted, "you want your ashes mixed with those of your dog?"

"Bessie was my best friend after your mother died. I want her with me. You can have a service, but I want Lise to take my ashes up the hill."

"I don't think I can make it up there, Dad," Lisa's mom said.

"I can do it, Mom," Lisa said while looking at her grandfather. She forced herself to stop crying and squeezed her grandfather's hand. "I'll do it, Grandpa Nate."

_That afternoon, House passed Cuddy the tissue while in the library._

* * *

"Say it."

House rolled his eyes. "Do I have to pinky swear and everything?"

"House."

"Fine, I promise. Happy now?"

Cuddy fought back tears, struggling with her broken words. "I can't do this alone."

"I said I'll be there," House said, his tone appropriately mirthless.

"Four o'clock?"

House nodded.


	8. New World

Thanks to my awesome beta: wrytingtyme! And thanks for reading & reviewing.

New World

_House watched her from a distance at first; he couldn't wrap his mind around the way he felt about the undergrad known as Lisa Cuddy. Weeks earlier, he'd left her high and dry one morning when they usually would have gone running together. He actually felt guilty about it. There was just something about her; House wanted to challenge her in a verbal sparring match one second and lock lips with her the next. He'd never felt that way about anyone before; she was simultaneously fascinating and absolutely aggravating and House had a strong notion that she felt the same way about him._

_Despite being the 'big man on campus' and the hotshot rookie who had made several calls his superiors missed, House was not overly confident when it came to members of the opposite sex. He'd chased after women before, and they eventually gave in to his blue eyes, but this time it was different. Lisa Cuddy was more than just someone to chase after. Blushing slightly, he cast his eyes downward, realizing that for probably the first time, House felt an attraction that transcended any other relationship he'd ever had. Magnetism, that was the best word he could think of to describe it. This was a whole new world, indeed._

_Standing up to his full height, and wiping any evidence of sentimentality from his expression, House put on an air of disinterest as she approached._

_Cuddy looked up at him quietly, obviously not up to any sort of banter, playful or not that day. "I'm not going running in the morning."_

_"That time of the month, huh?"_

_Frowning, she shook her head and pulled out a small redwood box from her book bag. "Up for a day trip?"_

_"I've got plans at ten."_

_"I've got class, but I'm not going."_

_"You? Miss goody-goody playing hooky?" He watched her as she slightly shrugged, her melancholy mood becoming contagious; House suddenly lost interest in trying to come up with something smart to say._

_Glancing at the box, she whispered, "I promised my grandfather I'd spread his ashes at his favorite spot; it's about nine hours from here and I didn't want to travel that far alone...."_

_House held out his hand, motioning for her to pass the small box to him. She hesitated briefly before handing it to him. House looked at the box, then at Cuddy and then back at the box._

_"This is heavier than it should be. Was your grandfather insanely obese?"_

_Cuddy shot him a raised eyebrow, almost smiling at his rudeness. "His dog's ashes are in there, too."_

_It was House's turn to raise his eyebrows. "Seriously?"_

_Cuddy nodded._

_He passed the box back to Cuddy, thought momentarily and said, "Yeah. Your grandfather sounds like a kook. I like him."_

_"You will show up this time, won't you?" she asked, finally holding him accountable._

_House nodded._

_"Why didn't you meet me that morning?"_

_House stared at her, wondering if he should fess up or simply lie. He thought she was too smart not to recognize the lie he intended to tell, and given her current state of melancholy, he told the truth. "I was hung over."_

_She placed her hand on his arm and forgiving him, she said, "Tomorrow, don't be."_

_______

It was an entirely new world with Cuddy; he had no idea what was happening between them, but at the moment, he tried not to think about it as they stood lip-locked in her office. That magnetism was back, not that it had ever really left.

"We shouldn't," she said breathlessly.

"But we will," he smirked.

"Not here."

"I've got this fantasy: you, me and the bike."

Cuddy smacked him on the arm. "Don't push it." She leaned in for a kiss, and he met her with equal intensity. "Wilson was right."

"What?" he asked.

"I _have_ given this too much thought."

"Your place, or mine?" House asked with a broad grin.

"Are you sure you want this?"

With his nose by her ear, he whispered, "You're not seriously thinking about the turkey baster method?"

"No. More like college. You're okay with the possibility of me getting pregnant?"

House sighed. "Because you're Miss. Fertile? I'll take my chances."

"Maybe you should just go home."

He pulled her in, and looked at her genuinely. "My place; Wilson would never believe it if I went to yours."


	9. Away

As always, thanks to my incredible beta: wrytingtyme. And thanks for reading and reviewing :)

Away

_Cuddy needed to get away; she wasn't sure that her choice in traveling companion was a wise one, however. As House threw several bags into the backseat, Cuddy watched on in wonderment._

_"What is all that?"_

_"You got me up at five am, refuse to ride in my car and you refuse to stop at the golden arches along the way. I need nourishment."_

_"Your car smells like beer and stale pizza. Do you honestly need three bags of food for a day trip?"_

_"I'm in training."_

_"For what? Sumo wrestling?"_

_House jumped into the front seat through the passenger window and shoved a fistful of chips into his mouth, followed by a large bite of beef jerky. "Mph, line," he swallowed, "backer."_

_"I don't allow anyone to eat in my car."_

_"Either get in or I'll get out."_

_With one hand on her hip, Cuddy glared at him before acquiescing._

_Ten minutes later, Cuddy turned her head in his direction. "So, did you bring anything for me?"_

_"Thought you'd never ask." House pulled out thermos of hot coffee and a bagel._

_"You brought this for me?"_

_"No, just decided it was too healthy for me this early in the morning."_

_Cuddy shot him a smile. It was good to get away. _

_______

"Get away!" Cuddy screamed.

Wilson put his hands up defensively as he backed away from her bedside. "Hey, I'm not going anywhere. I'm here, it's okay," he said, trying to be reassuring.

Cuddy emitted a guttural growl, which grew from a low moan to a terrifying roar as she once again doubled over in pain. "Get. The. Hell. Away! If House can't be man enough to be here right now, he has no business sending you instead."

Wilson looked on sympathetically. "Cuddy, he didn't send me. He knows; he was here when you were brought in. I'm just here as your friend."

"I don't want _you_ here. Get out, just get away!" she hollered, tears now streaking her face. Cuddy batted at the nurse who was checking the connection to the fetal heart monitor; so far she'd pushed three nurses away with a verbal lashing and told her doctor that under no circumstance was he to ask her if she was doing okay, if she needed anything or if there was anything he could do.

Wilson backed out of her room slowly, his heart breaking for her, amazed at her incredible strength. It was not her strength in giving birth naturally that impressed him; it was her strength in giving birth two and a half months early, after what had been a seemingly routine pregnancy, one in which her belly had proudly announced that she would finally have her dream. He was beyond impressed with her strength during natural, premature labor, all the while knowing her son would most likely be stillborn.


	10. Ashes

Thanks to my extraordinary beta: wrytingtyme. And thanks for reading and reviewing :)

Ashes

_"Is this legal?"_

_Cuddy shrugged. "Don't know. Do you really care if this is legal or not?"_

_One corner of House's mouth curled upwards. "No."_

_They stood atop a small hill, overlooking a grassy knoll. "Why here?"_

_Cuddy took the redwood box from House and opened the lid. "This is where my grandfather used to come to pray." She stopped to look at him. "When my grandmother died, he stopped praying to God and started talking to her. I followed him up here once and heard him; he caught me and this became our spot."_

_"You're not going to say a prayer or anything, are you?" House asked, impatiently._

_"He would have hated that. No, I'm just going to spread the ashes and we can go."_

_Cuddy held the small box aloft and tipped it slightly, allowing the ashes to spill out slowly. She shook the box, sending the fine dust down to the ground in wavy ribbons of what was once living flesh. She tilted the box completely upside down, allowing the last remnants of her beloved grandfather and his dog to fall to the earth._

_Cuddy placed the lid back on the box, inhaled deeply and shook her head, trying to keep the tears from falling. House stood beside her, unsure of what to do in such a private and emotional moment; he wasn't sure why he was even there._

_Gaining her composure, Cuddy looked him in the eye and nodded. "Let's go."_

_"That's it? We drove nine hours for five minutes?"_

_"What did you expect?"_

_"A thank you kiss?"_

_Cuddy half-heartedly chuckled, turned to face him, reached up on her tip toes and kissed him on the cheek. "Happy now?"_

_"I would be if you were my Great-Aunt Gertrude. What kind of kiss was that?"_

_"The only one you're getting today. I just buried my grandfather."_

_"So, what are my chances tomorrow?" he asked with a smirk._

_______

Cuddy was rooted to the spot she once loved more than any other; she no longer felt that way. The small hill looked nearly the same as it had twenty years earlier, with the exception of some overgrown brush and the slightly brownish hue of the grassy knoll below.

This was sacred ground; ground her grandfather was laid to rest in and now too, the ashes of her son.

She pulled the small redwood box from her bag and took a shuddering breath at her loss; she'd been so close to happiness she could almost taste it, only to literally have him ripped from her womb.

She began to weep in earnest as the blood pulsated through her ears with the throbbing of her head. The quietness of her one time favorite spot was deafening, so loud that she was startled when she felt a firm hand on her shoulder.

'He squeezed her shoulder and though she didn't turn to face him, she whispered, "I thought you weren't coming. We said four o'clock; it takes an hour and a half to get here and I wanted to do this at sunset."

"I was five minutes late. You couldn't have waited five minutes?"

"What was so important that you couldn't be here to bury your son on time?"

House walked around from behind her and stood directly in front of her. "I didn't think blood stained scrubs were appropriate attire."

Cuddy gaped at House as he stood there in slacks, her favorite blue shirt and a dark sport jacket. Though not ironed, or necessarily a suit, House was right. He looked far better in the outfit than in scrubs.

"You're forgiven," she said. Looking up into his eyes she quietly said, "Ready?"

House nodded.

And like so many years earlier, Cuddy removed the lid to the same redwood box and slowly drizzled the contents of the box in the same area where her grandfather now rested.

When she was finished, Cuddy turned towards House and looked up to find his eyes glassy, though he tried to hide it by glancing away.

She tucked her arms under his and hugged him. He didn't pull away, nor did he hug back. Unsure of what to do with his arms, he placed one hand on her shoulder, his cane hanging by his fingertips and he took the box from her with his other hand. They stood silently in a sort of half-embrace as the sun dipped below the horizon.

"It's over, isn't it?" she whispered.

Not moving his chin from the top of her head, he nodded.

_______


	11. Edge

_Cuddy sat on the edge of the passenger seat on the long drive back to Michigan, holding a shopping bag up to her mouth as she vomited. House drove over the speed limit, his only wish to be rid of the puking girl next to him. _

"_I told you not to get the vegetable burrito."_

"_Shut up; you ate green pork. How come you're not puking?"_

"_Cast iron stomach."_

_She leaned back into her seat, keeping the bag close at hand, weary from the long road trip, and exhausted from the stomach pains and headache. She stifled a half-hearted chuckle. "If this was a date, you could brag to your friends about how it was the worst one of your life."_

_He raised his eyebrows, not denying her words. "You wanted to stop for Mexican."_

"_Don't…." Cuddy swallowed hard, "talk about food."_

_House looked at her from the corner of his eye. "Your stomach's empty; you've been dry heaving for two hours now."_

"_Don't remind me. How much further?"_

"_If we have to keep stopping every ten minutes so you can use the little girl's room, it'll be another five hours or more. At this rate, we won't get home until three in the morning."_

"_Oh god," she said, grasping her stomach._

"_Deep breaths," House said, squirming slightly. He may have chosen the medical profession as his career, but no amount of vomit would ever be a pleasant experience. "You're going to need fluids."_

"_No. Just take me home so I can die in peace."_

_House rolled his eyes. "This is one hell of a first date."_

"_Who said it was a date?"_

"_That top you're wearing."_

"_What's wrong with my blouse?"_

"_Nothing. Let's just say I'm enjoying the view."_

_Before Cuddy could respond, another wave of nausea hit and she buried her face into the bag. "Find another gas station. Fast."_

_________

_Six hours and a dozen pit stops later, House pulled up to the hospital's ER entrance back at Michigan and walked around to Cuddy's side, waiting for her to exit the car. She sat with her feet on the pavement, unable to stand from her seat._

"_Just take me home. I'm fine. I'm too tired for this."_

"_I've been in that car for more hours than I've spent in my apartment for the last week. Get out of the damn car." House was beyond exhausted and in no mood to argue with her._

"_House," she whined._

"_Get out or I'll carry you into the hospital for all to see, except I'll gladly announce that you're strung out on drugs and alcohol for all to hear."_

_She tipped her head to the side, giving him a disbelieving look and shook her head. "You wouldn't."_

_His jaw set, House swiftly reached in, placed one hand under her legs and the other under her arms and hoisted her up. "Wouldn't I?"_

_Frowning, she struggled out of his grasp. "Put me down. Fine, I'll go in."_

_House set her down, waited for her to walk inside the hospital and parked the car before returning to find her sitting on the edge of a chair, filling out paperwork. Later that day, after she'd been given fluids and cleared to go home, they returned to campus in silence; the only word uttered between the pair was one of thanks on her part. _

_Cuddy wondered if she'd ever see him again._

_______

They'd fallen over the edge, past the point of no return. Twenty years seemed to have passed in the blink of an eye and there, in his apartment, House and Cuddy once again experienced the reckless abandon that youth takes for granted.

That night, twenty years of banter created something more than just a connection.


	12. Voice

As always, thanks to my brilliant beta: wrytingtyme! Don't know what I'd do without her. And thanks for reading and reviewing...I really appreciate it.

Voice

_Cuddy slept from five pm until nine o'clock the next morning following her food poisoning ordeal. She would have slept longer had she not heard the phone ring at her bedside. She lifted the receiver and allowed it to fall back into place, wanting nothing more than sleep._

_When the phone rang again, she chose not to answer it, instead allowing it to ring. And ring. And ring. On the twenty-first ring, she answered._

"_Hello?"_

"_Where are you?"_

_It was that voice. His voice. "What?" she asked, not quite awake._

"_Morning. Running. You didn't show."_

"_Food poisoning. Puking. Sleep."_

"_I don't have to come drag your sorry ass back to the ER, do I?"_

"_I'm hanging up now."_

"_I'm never going on another road trip with you again," he said, in that voice that haunted her dreams as of late._

"_No worries. I don't have any grandparents left."_

"_Goodnight, Cuddy."_

"_Wait, House?"_

"_What?"_

"_Thanks."_

_______

Cuddy heard the commotion in the far corner; the neonatal team was furiously working on her newborn son, trying to revive him. It had been at least fifteen minutes since his birth and other than a brief heartbeat shortly afterwards, he'd had no further signs of life. All Cuddy wanted for her little dream was peace. He was gone.

She looked up at House and squeezed his hand, silently pleading with him to make them stop.

"We need an intubatation kit-" one of the doctors said. They'd gone above and beyond in their efforts to revive the newborn; this wasn't just any baby, this was the Dean's son.

That's when Cuddy heard his voice; it wasn't his manipulative voice, his cocky voice, nor the one that emerged when a rare moment of raw emotion revealed itself. Instead, it was a commanding, take-charge voice; it was one she had heard only a few times before.

House made it to the corner in three impressive strides. "Stop. _Get out_."

The doctor and nurses paused temporarily to look at him before returning their attention back to the small, lifeless form. Cuddy began to cry silent tears of grief for her child and of gratitude for the voice she knew held their son's best interest at heart.

House's voice boomed, "Take your hands off of him right now or you _will_ hear from my lawyer. What's the going rate for malpractice right now? Enjoy your jobs much? Pretty tough to get hired if you get fired for ignoring parental rights." Looking up at the clock, House declared, "Time of death, seven-twenty-eight, am."

The staff backed away as House turned his attention towards the OBGYN who still sat at the foot of Cuddy's bed.

"Finished?"

The doctor nodded.

"Get out and don't let anyone else back into this room."

House waited for the doctors and nurses to leave the before he dimmed the lights. He then made his way to the isolet in the corner where he removed the various wires and tubes from his son's body. He removed the cap that had been placed on his head, smoothing the black hair with his hand, and he cut the remnants of the umbilical cord and cleaned his premature body with a cloth. Finally, he wrapped him in a powder blue blanket, in preparations of taking him to his mother.


	13. push

Thanks to my beta: wrytingtyme!!! And thanks for reading & reviewing :)

Push

_House wasn't exactly sure why he called her. He knew she would be perfectly fine, it was a standard case of food poisoning, but he felt compelled to call her that morning. And truth be told, he knew he'd wake her with that phone call and the thought of annoying her, made him smile. He knew it was childish, but he couldn't help it; he knew exactly what it took to push her buttons and he enjoyed doing it._

_At noon, he dialed her phone number again. _

"_Hello?" a considerably less groggy voice answered._

"_Care for a veggie burrito?"_

"_Are you trying to make me throw up?"_

"_Have you eaten anything yet?"_

"_No."_

"_Come downstairs and meet me for lunch."_

"_Oh, please do not mention food."_

"_Got something special, just for you."_

"_I don't want it."_

"_Sure you do. It's your favorite."_

"_House, if I so much as look at anything other than water, I'm going to have a repeat performance of yesterday."_

_"What, afraid of a little chili?"_

_House heard her swallow hard on the other end of the line. "Don't push it, House." _

_He rolled his eyes. "Are you coming down or not?"_

"_I thought you'd never want to see me again after last night."_

"_I never want to see your vomit again."_

"_That makes two of us. I'll meet you tomorrow morning, even if I can only manage to walk. Okay?"_

_She swore she could hear his frown._

_"Fine."_

_Ten minutes later, there was a knock on Cuddy's door. Wishing whoever it was would just go away, she opened the door to find him standing there, a small paper bag in hand._

_"Here," he said, holding out the bag for her. He was expressionless in his tone. "Don't be late tomorrow."_

_House turned on his heel and disappeared down the hall before Cuddy could say a word. Closing the door, she opened the bag to find a stack of saltine crackers and a ginger ale. Smiling, she walked to the kitchen for a glass._

_______

House stood outside the door, peering in just as he had hours earlier when Cuddy received her diagnosis in the exam room. Cuddy had thrown everyone out of the room except for two nurses and her doctor, and now with her feet in stirrups, she was relying solely on herself, working hard to bring her doomed baby into the world.

Wilson approached House from behind. He placed a hand on House's shoulder and the pair stood silently, watching. Surprisingly, House did not pull away from his friend's touch.

"She only wants you in there."

House said nothing. He could not define his feelings; fear, apprehension, concern and heartache were masked by his stubborn, feigned indifference. He could not admit, even to himself, that he needed to be in there with her.

"She refused pain management. She's labored without an epidural or any other pain meds."

Furrowing his brow, House turned to look at Wilson. "Why?"

Eyes locked on House, Wilson briefly debated whether or not to tell him. "She said it would be the last time she would feel him; that she wouldn't have a lifetime to take care of him and she doesn't want to miss even one minute of being with him. " Wilson paused, again unsure if he should mention the final tidbit. House had turned his attention back to the room, where Cuddy bravely pushed as a nurse counted to ten. She did not scream, nor cry out. She bore her pain with bravery.

"I think she wants the pain; she's using the physical pain to override her emotional pain," Wilson finished.

House again looked at Wilson. "Gating mechanism."

Wilson nodded.

Without saying another word, House stepped into the room, tapped the nurse on the shoulder and switched places with her. With fear in her eyes, she looked up at him for reassurance and frantically reached for his hand. He allowed her to grab on to his hand and she held firm for the duration.

House looked at the OBGYN who sat in the catcher's position before turning his attention to the monitor. "Another one's coming," House said. He watched her whole body tense with the contraction. "Push, Cuddy."

She shook her head, exhausted from the ordeal, afraid she wouldn't be able to deliver this baby on her own.

"You can do this," he said. "Okay, one more time, now. That's it. One, two, three, four, five six…."

Cuddy gasped; she had always hated the number one.

Squeezing his hand tight, Cuddy bore down with all her strength, overwhelmed with her pain. Not one whimper escaped her lips. Less than twenty minutes later, a disturbingly still infant passed from her body into a world of silence and Cuddy's physical pain was instantly forgotten upon realizing her son was not breathing.


	14. Discover

Thanks to my beta: Wrytingtyme! And thanks for the reviews :) The sequel to 'Ours' will not be posted until early in the new year. So far it's at 43,000 words and I don't think I'm even half way done with it yet. It's called 'Theirs'.

Discover

_Cuddy discovered him sitting on a ledge halfway between her dorm and the parking lot the next morning. He was not clad in running gear, nor did he look up to the task of running. He looked tired, worn. Apprehensively, she approached._

"_House?"_

_He looked up at her, raised an eyebrow and again tucked his chin to his chest. "Not going running today."_

"_Why not?"_

"_Don't feel like it."_

_Cuddy took a seat next to him on the ledge and looked out towards the parking lot, watching another student struggle with placing a large suitcase into his car._

"_Going home for the break?" she asked._

_House shrugged. "Nah."_

"_Don't you want to go home?"_

_House inhaled deeply before turning to look at her. "You going home?"_

"_No. My parents are going to visit my aunt in Boston."_

_He nodded. "So, you're staying here then."_

"_I guess. Why aren't you going home?"_

"_Too much studying to do."_

_At that, Cuddy laughed out loud. "You? Study? You absorb information without cracking open a book. You don't need to study anymore than I need to shave my chin."_

"_You shave your chin? Seriously?"_

_Cuddy chuckled as she stood from her perch on the ledge. "I'll see you around during the break, House."_

"_You still owe me that kiss."_

"_You can have that kiss once I discover what makes you tick," she said as she walked away, not looking back over her shoulder to see his response._

_______

It was late, past nine o'clock on a Thursday evening and Cuddy was stretched out on the couch in her office, with several files open in her lap. She was fast asleep.

House watched her from outside her office door for several minutes before making his way inside. He wasn't sure what the two of them had gotten themselves into; he wasn't sure if he was okay with it and he sure as hell wasn't sure what to do with the information he had discovered. He thought he was okay with it initially. He'd agreed to it, certainly, but somehow the possibility seemed like a remote chance and yet here he was, on the verge of chaos, suddenly thrown into a vortex of mass confusion.

He picked up the files that were strewn about and haphazardly placed them on the adjacent chair before shaking Cuddy's shoulder. She mumbled something incoherently and slowly opened her eyes, frowning at the man who had woken her from a deep sleep.

"Go away."

"We need to talk."

"Too tired."

"That's what we need to talk about."

"House, just go home."

"You're pregnant."

"I think I'd know if I was pregnant or not."

"You're late this month, you're tired all the time, and you've been sick three days in a row before your first meeting of the day, not to mention the twins are definitely more fun to look at lately."

Not fully awake, she shook her head. "What time is it?"

"Quarter after nine. Go home, get some sleep."

"Are you being caring?" she asked with a raised brow.

"You've got my baby on board. Go home. Sleep."

"You're delusional. I'm not pregnant; I'd know it if I was."

House headed towards the lobby. "Goodnight, Mommy."

_______

Later that night, Cuddy sat on the edge of her bathtub, holding a positive pregnancy test. Tears streamed down her face and her heart fluttered with excitement and fear. It couldn't be and yet it was; she was pregnant.

Less than twenty minutes later, her cell phone rang from the bedroom and she ran to answer it, knowing exactly who would be on the other end of the line.

"I was right, wasn't I?" he asked.

Smiling and sobbing and not quite sure what to do with herself, Cuddy sat down on the bed and whispered, "Yes."


	15. Torn

As always, thanks to my amazing beta: Wrytingtyme and thanks to those who read & review!

Torn

_House watched as she approached. A week had passed since what they would eventually refer to as 'the vomit trip from hell' and they'd resumed their silent runs in the morning. _

_His classmates mocked him about his choice in running companion; he'd brushed them off with comments about Cuddy's ass and his friends would stop the teasing temporarily with his reminders. It was true, Cuddy's ass and chest were the two things that first drew him to her, but as time wore on, he was also fascinated with her intelligence and wit. He was torn, however. Things were easy at the moment. Neither expressed an interest in taking this thing between them any further and yet, House wondered if Cuddy was as good in bed as she was at verbally challenging him. _

_With trepidation, House casually made the first move that morning as they neared the end of their run. "My roommate went home for the break."_

"_Mine, too."_

"_But I live in an apartment off campus."_

_They slowed to a jog and Cuddy looked up at him. She was flushed from the run, but had she not been, he would have seen her blush. "I was planning on stopping by Milly's tomorrow for a late dinner. I'll be there around eight." She flashed him a smile and began to jog off towards her dorm._

_With the corner of his mouth turned upwards, House headed for home._

_______

House stood outside of the exam room and watched Cuddy as she nervously waited for the results of her ultrasound. He'd arrived minutes after she was brought in, his stomach turning as he waited for some sign from the OBGYN.

He watched as Cuddy shook her head and covered her mouth with her hand, tears flowing streaking her face. Whatever the news, it was not good.

The OBGYN stepped out of the exam room and headed for the nurse's station. House caught his eye and raised a brow, questioning the man without words.

"Doctor-patient confidentiality, Dr. House. You know I can't give you that information."

House pursed his lips. "Do you think she got herself pregnant?"

Knowing full well that House and Cuddy had been together up until very recently, the doctor placed Cuddy's file on the counter and gave House a meaningful look before directing his gaze at the file. "I have to order a few tests, I'll be back," he said walking away, leaving the file behind.

House thumbed through the file and his heart dropped upon reading that Cuddy hadn't felt fetal movement all morning and that the doctor couldn't find the baby's heartbeat.

He was torn. Two weeks earlier, House had pulled away; her pregnancy and what it meant having finally hit home. He thought he could handle it. He was wrong.

Wilson had practically begged him to rethink his actions and to think about Cuddy and the baby. House had done nothing since; his every waking thought was of Cuddy and his unborn son. He'd been there when the ultrasound detected it was a boy. House had announced the baby's sex before the technician could open his mouth. Had he been excited? Proud? Scared to death? He wasn't sure but only a month after that ultrasound, fear settled in.

He'd never fully expected Cuddy to get pregnant. She hadn't managed to sustain a pregnancy previously. He knew it was what she wanted, he knew it was a possibility when he went commando, but a small part of his brain was in absolute denial, despite having agreed that he would be okay should she get pregnant.

Allowing long held doubts to resurface about his ability to raise a child to be a healthy, whole adult, and allowing his fear of becoming like his own father to take hold, House pushed away the possibility that he might for once in his life, have found a small slice of happiness. Instead, he pushed away the one person who held the key and retreated into his walled-off self.

He used an argument to create the rift between them. Cuddy hadn't decided on a first name yet, but one afternoon she declared she wanted their son's last name to be 'Cuddy-House'. House refused. After a long argument, he'd left her alone in her office and they'd literally not spoken since. Snippets of that conversation flooded his mind daily.

_"So, you're ashamed of him. You don't want our son to have your name."_

_"If that's what you want to believe, fine. Yes, I'm ashamed of our illegitimate son. Happy now?"_

_"I knew you would do this. That's it? You're just going to walk out on him? On me?"_

_They stood inches apart, the tension thick between them. He said nothing._

_"Fine. Walk out now and you won't be welcomed back. I don't want you anywhere near me or my baby."_

_House glared at her and though leaving was the last thing he actually wanted to do, he opened the door and walked out._

And now he stood peering in at a weeping Cuddy, his stomach churning for the inevitable loss of their son. Torn between being by her side and retreating to his office to fester, House allowed his confusion and anger to grab hold as he headed towards the elevator.


	16. Hands

As always, thank to my amazing beta: Wrytingtyme & thanks for reading and reviewing.

***This is the last post until after Thanksgiving weekend. I will finish out this story then.

Hands

_Half emptied beer bottles littered the second hand coffee table in the living room. Neither needed so much as a drop of alcohol; both knew exactly what they were doing. House had met Cuddy outside of the restaurant, and less than ten minutes later, they were in his bedroom, sans shirts and beer._

_Surprisingly, he was the hesitant one at first; she the aggressor. She pulled him in for the first intense kiss since that moment in the library weeks earlier and that was all it took for House to follow suit. Despite any lingering doubts he had about his reputation with this underclassman, he allowed himself to become intrinsically lost in the moment. _

_Cuddy intrepidly admired his muscular arms, finding it difficult to believe that she was there, in his apartment, with THE Gregory House, the student everyone else simultaneously admired, hated and envied. She refused to think about what she was doing; if she would have allowed herself to think about it, even for just a moment, Cuddy knew she would be back at her dorm. _

_His hands shook with adrenaline as he unhooked her bra. She silenced his hands by taking them in her own, and pulling him close._

_Whatever inhibitions either one of them may have had at the start of the evening were now a distant memory; they were at the point of no return._

_______

Now clean and wrapped in the powder-blue blanket, House picked up the small bundle and cradled him in the crook of his left arm. Noticing a little hand as it poked through the blanket, House realized he was not as adept at wrapping a baby as the neonatal team would have been.

He unwrapped the blanket and lifted two tiny hands with the tips of his thumbs. House stared at both his own fingers and those of the baby's; it was as if he was holding his own hands in miniature, and it was then that it hit him. This baby, this little boy who had previously been an obscure thought, was not merely a fetus who once grew inside of Cuddy, but what should have been a living, breathing, son. His son. Their son. Properly bundling his son once more, House carried him to Cuddy's bedside.

She kept her head turned towards the window as he approached, unable to look at either House or her stillborn son. House stood at her bedside, unsure of how to present Cuddy with her child. Rather awkwardly, he placed the baby on her left side, forcing her to either look at him or close her eyes.

House sat in the adjacent chair, unable to look at her as she wept.

Moments later, a nurse stepped in, forms in hand and oblivious to the scene in front of her, she began to question them. "I'm so sorry for your loss. Because he had a heartbeat at birth, he needs a name for legal purposes."

House looked at Cuddy, trying to quell his anger at the intrusion. Cuddy shook her head.

House stood from his chair, walked towards the nurse and guided her out of the room by her elbow. When they reached the hall, House found Wilson standing near the nurse's station. Though Wilson's face was perfectly dry, his eyes gave away the truth; he'd shed tears, too. House looked directly at Wilson and Wilson nodded in understanding.

Upon retreating to Cuddy's room, House heard Wilson step in front of the door, telling the nurse, "No one is to go in there. If you have anything at all for either of them, leave it with me."


	17. Shiver

As always, thanks to Wrytingtyme the Great for beta-ing. And thanks for reading and reviewing and sticking with this fic. Just three more chapters after this one.

_The shiver started as a tingling sensation somewhere near her eyebrows. By the time it reached her toes, Cuddy suddenly remembered where she was and why. _

_House was dead to the world and didn't so much as flinch when she pulled her arm out from under his. Moving as quietly as possible, Cuddy gathered her belongings, dressed quickly and escaped out the front door, all the while wondering what on earth she had been thinking the evening prior._

_Cuddy had her goals; she had set those goals long before high school ended. She was on the fast track to success and a relationship with anyone was not on the agenda. She had priorities; school had to be number one and for the past several weeks, Cuddy couldn't ignore that she'd allowed her grades to slip just a bit. An "A-" or a "B+" were simply not acceptable. _

_She chanced one last glance at the sleeping House and though she knew her future career was of utmost importance, a small part of her wondered what would happen should she stay. Recalling her slipping grades, Cuddy chose not to give the 'what if' a second thought and walked away._

_______

Cuddy knew instantly that something was wrong. She hadn't shivered once during her seven and a half months of her pregnancy; she ran hot all the time, finding it difficult to cool off, but she never shivered. She got up, showered, dressed as she normally did every morning, stopping to admire her protruding belly in the mirror, but something was definitely wrong. The baby was always active first thing in the morning, but he hadn't moved since the day before. Another shiver went down her spine, sending a rash of goose bumps down her arms.

In her heart, she knew. She knew deep down that this was the end. Cuddy considered calling House, though they hadn't spoken in weeks. She wanted to call him; she needed to call him. Convincing herself that she was fine, though knowing she wasn't, Cuddy went to work.

_______

"Hello?" he asked.

"Wilson?"

"Cuddy? Is everything okay?"

"No," she asked with a shaky voice.

"Where are you?"

"Room 305. They can't find a heartbeat."

"I'll be there in five minutes."

"Wilson? He needs to know."

"I'll find him, Cuddy."


	18. Secret

Thanks to my beta: Wrytingtime!!!! And thanks for reading/reviewing. This was fun to write (despite the subject matter). The format kept it interesting. I've been bored/stuck/frustrated with writing for a while now and have had some trouble with 'Theirs'...where it sat untouched for literally weeks (and I almost gave up on it all together), but this fic recharged my batteries I think. Thanks for the feedback...I really appreciate it.

Secret

_How would she be able to keep it a secret? Cuddy had avoided House since the morning she'd left his apartment. He hadn't called, showed up on her doorstep with a bag of crackers and ginger ale in hand, or met her in the morning for a run._

_But this was something she couldn't keep from him._

_________

_Drumming up every last ounce of courage, Cuddy knocked on the door to House's apartment._

"_Don't want any, go away," she heard from the other side of the door._

"_House, it's me."_

"_Like I said, don't want any. Go away."_

_Pounding her fist again, she called out, "We need to talk."_

"_I've got company."_

"_No you don't. Either open up or I'll announce to the rest of this complex that you're…."_

_The front door opened and Cuddy was greeted with a firm scowl, worn by a man who looked like he hadn't slept in a week._

"_Are you going to let me in?" she asked, standing with her hands on her hips._

_House turned away from the door, leaving it open, as he walked back towards the kitchen. Cuddy walked in, shut the door and followed him inside._

"_You're hiding something," he said as he gave her the once over. "What's your secret?"_

"_I don't have a secret."_

_He closed his eyes. "Is it mine?"_

_Hurt by his question, she shook her head. "I don't sleep around." Cuddy paused, waiting for him to respond, but he remained silent. Cuddy inhaled deeply and asked, "How did you know?"_

"_Why else would you be here? You're the one who walked away, remember?"_

"_What are we going to do?" Cuddy asked, turning away from him._

"_There's an abortion clin-"_

"_I'm not having an abortion. I can't kill a baby."_

"_Cuddy, it's a pack of cells, a fetus. I'm not-"_

"_Do you think I'm ready for this? I have plans, too. You don't get to the top by getting pregnant and having babies before finishing your undergrad year."_

"_How late are you?"_

"_Two weeks."_

"_You might not be pregnant."_

"_I have an appointment next week with an OBGYN."_

"_I'll pay for half."_

"_I'm not having an abortion."_

"_Do you want this baby?"_

_Cuddy cast her eyes downward as she shrugged her shoulders. "I've never wanted kids. I don't see myself…." She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I have to do what's right."_

"_An abortion's what's right."_

_Cuddy sighed and silently walked towards the front door. Without looking back, she left his apartment and headed home._

_______

He stared at her from across her desk. "How long do you expect to keep it a secret? You're going to look like you swallowed a watermelon in a few months. Hard to keep that a secret."

"Just until we figure out this thing," she said, motioning between the two of them with her hand.

"This thing has twenty-three chromosomes," he said.

"That's not what I meant."

"But I have to tell my BFF, Jimm-"

"Fine, tell Wilson, but no one else. Don't even kid about it with your team."

"Best way to hide something is to leave it in full sight."

"Not this."

House leaned down towards Cuddy's stomach and said, "Your mommy's going to be in so much trouble with the board."

Cuddy eyed him as he stood up. "And what exactly do you think you're going to be in?"

"Hey, I was the one taken advantage of by my boss; this is all on you."


	19. Left

Again, thanks to my beta who really goes above and beyond: Wrytingtyme. And thanks for reading & reviewing. Home stretch. Last ficlet to be posted tomorrow.

Left

_House ran hard that morning, pounding out his aggression through the soles of his feet. He hadn't heard from Cuddy in over a week. He tried to convince himself that it didn't matter, that she was just another notch on his proverbial bed post, except he knew deep down that she was the exact opposite of such a notion._

_As he rounded the corner and headed out on the final stretch of his morning run, he couldn't help but imagine what his father would say, should he find out he would be a grandfather far too soon. He knew what he'd do; he'd force House to marry Cuddy. House wasn't ready for marriage; he sure as hell wasn't ready for a child. He could barely take care of himself, much less a wife and child. 'Wife'. That was the single most frightening word he'd ever heard, next to 'pregnant'._

_He was so lost in his thoughts of Cuddy that he flinched when he felt her presence to his left. She matched him stride for stride, working hard to keep up with him. He didn't turn to look at her or slow down to accommodate her smaller stature, so they ran in silence, for longer than the final stretch normally lasted. And when House had finally grown tired, he slowed to a stop, placed his hands on his knees and tried his best to keep from vomiting._

_When he straightened, she met him eye to eye. She lost her nerve at the last second and cast her eyes downward, embarrassed by what she had to say. "I got my period."_

_She raised her eyes once more and they stood with gazes locked, motionless, for what seemed like eternity and when her breathing returned to normal and his cheeks lost the flushed tinge of exertion, he nodded in relief._

_She gave a curt smile, releasing him of any responsibility and the two parted ways, each running towards what they thought would be a separate future._

_______

Cuddy knew that House wasn't the one who left. Recalling his words, about believing what she wanted to, she realized that she was the one who walked out, who left him out of fear.

She wanted to be happy, but she was leery of it. On the verge of bliss, she allowed her mind to wander, thinking of how it couldn't be. Wouldn't be. And Cuddy wondered if he really was ashamed of the child she carried. She had been ashamed all those years ago; ashamed for possibly having become pregnant at a time when her sole focus should have been, and usually was, school. Cuddy shook her head, remembering how a child was the furthest thing from her mind at the time. She was goal oriented, career minded, focused. She'd never wanted a child, not until it was nearly too late to have one and yet here she was, literally barefoot and pregnant as she sat in her large home, alone.

Pregnancy as a single mother had seemed like an ideal solution not all that long ago; now it seemed like a nightmare. She was terrified of going this route alone, and yet, she left him. Cuddy knew he'd left her to a certain extent, too, but she knew she walked away just as willingly.

And at the heart of it all, was a precious child. He was her focus now; he had to be. Her baby would grow up and Cuddy suddenly felt overwhelmingly responsible, only this time, she was an adult and she could handle it. She thought she could, anyway.


	20. Light

Okay, here it is, the last chapter. Hope it wasn't too confusing! Thanks for reading and reviewing and thanks to my beta, Wrytingtyme, who honestly is nothing short of amazing.

Light

_They had parted ways. House avoided the library; Cuddy avoided his running path. Months flew by without so much as a glimpse of one another and with each passing day, memories faded. The sting of regret, of what could have been, dissipated. Cuddy finished the term at the top of her class. House finished with a stern reprimand regarding protocol, personal safety and the misuse of hospital property._

_On the dawn of moving day, during that moment when the sun is not yet fully awake, in which its effervescent tendrils of light cascade through the trees, highlighting only those in just the right spot, they caught a chance glimpse of one another. And in that moment, a whisper of regret snaked past his ear as a sigh of lost potential whizzed past hers._

_"I heard what you did for that patient. It was risky," she said, not quite accusing him, though not without admiration, either._

_"It was medically necessary."_

_"Not everyone thinks so."_

_"But you do."_

_"It's not my opinion that counts."_

_He shrugged his shoulders. "I needed to know."_

_"At any cost?"_

_"The patient agrees with me."_

_"Because he's still alive. Rules are set for a reason."_

_"Protocol is pointless for those who don't fit inside the box."_

_"Or color outside the lines?"_

_"Lines are for those who have no imagination," he said._

_Cuddy began to back away, again smiling genuinely at him. "That patient is lucky you aren't afraid to color outside the lines."_

_He shot her a half smile before she finally turned towards the parking lot, wondering if she'd ever see him again._

_______

Cuddy sat in a wheelchair nearest the window. Light filtered in through the half drawn shade, flooding her lap with warmth. She purposely kept her hands in the sunlight, finding the room to be on the chilly side; it was a point she intended to address as soon as she was back at work.

She was heading home that morning, empty handed and empty bellied. She sat in the wheelchair, feeling ridiculous about the policy to escort any and all patients out of the hospital via a wheelchair. It was another point she intended to address. She had more notes floating about her mind than she had hairs on her head; it was easier to think of what needed to be done with the hospital than it was to remember why she was in the wheelchair in the first place.

House appeared at the doorway with Wilson in tow.

"Are you ready?" Wilson asked.

Cuddy nodded.

"Are you sure you don't want to spen-"

"I'm fine, Wilson. I just want to go home, alone."

House sat on the edge of her bed and picked at the remnants of her breakfast. "So, do I get bereavement leave?" he asked flippantly. "I'm not doing clinic duty for at least a week."

"House," Wilson sighed.

"What? It's not like-"

"Shut up. Just shut up," Cuddy snapped, removing her eyes from the window.

A nurse appeared in the doorway, paperwork in hand and approached Wilson. "Excuse me Doctor? I'm sorry, but you said to give anything to-"

"Thank you," Wilson said, cutting her off in an effort to shoo her away.

"What is it, Wilson?" Cuddy sighed.

Wilson hesitated as he placed one hand on his hip before he held the paperwork out for House with his other hand. With a furrowed brow, House took the file and thumbed through it.

"Well?" Cuddy asked again.

"He needs a name," House said succinctly.

Cuddy inhaled slightly and brought her hand to her forehead, shielding her eyes from both of them. She shook her head, unable to bestow a name upon her now deceased child. It was the last step in severing all ties with him; it was a step she was unwilling and unable to take.

"This isn't going to go away, Cuddy. He needs a name," Wilson prodded gently.

"Nathaniel." House whispered. He paused to look at her and he could see the glisten of unshed tears in the corner of her eye. House then lowered his voice and stared at the floor when he said, "Nathaniel Gregory Cuddy."

Wilson looked between House and Cuddy, who now sat with eyes fixed on one another; she stared at his shirt, he just past her ear. In the quiet of the room, they seemed to come to an understanding and Cuddy nodded in agreement.

Wilson filled out the form and delivered it to the nurse's station, leaving the one time lovers alone.

"You're not ashamed?" she asked.

"Should I be?"

"You said-"

"I said believe what you want."

Cuddy nodded as the sun shifted slightly, the light now partially blocked by the shades. "I was going to name him Nathaniel."

Leaving the warmth of the light from the window, house hooked his cane on the back of the wheelchair and pushed Cuddy towards the doorway. And as they crossed over the threshold, he leaned down and whispered, "I know."

Fin.


End file.
